Thursday, September 30, 2010

New dreams

Bird on the Street posted this link on her Facebook page the other day. Go over there right now and check it out...then come back here...otherwise this post will make no sense to you.

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I want to find the time to get my photo done with my sign and submit it, but I don't know if I'll have time (I'm actually in an airport right now on my way to Toronto for 5 days...and then I'm only home for a week before I leave again, but this time for 17 days).



I laid in bed the other night thinking about what I would tell myself the day before Ben was diagnosed with CP. I tossed a very ideas around and then came up with this one:



You will dream
new dreams
for your family.



And this one has stuck in my head all week.

I remembered back to when I was pregnant and knew I was having 2 boys. I remember dreaming of them rough-housing, playing sports together. Hanging out with their dad in the backyard...throwing the football around.

I didn't have a lot of dreams for them. But when I thought of a life with twin boys...this is what I thought of.

And then. D-day. Exactly one week after their 1st birthday, a pediatric neuroligist says to me "you know he has CP right?" And those dreams? Those simple dreams went poof. Up in smoke.

I know that dream might seem silly to some. Who cares if your kid can play sports? Lots of kids don't play sports and they're OK.

And yep, they're somewhat right. But it was MY dream. MY dream of a life with my sons.

So yeah...those dreams died. And I mourned them. For a long time.

And then eventually, I started dreaming new dreams. Even better dreams.

Dreams of Ben playing wheelchair basketball - you should see his hook shot!

Dreams of Ben skiing (yeah, with adaptive equipment) and being even faster than Daniel for once.

Dreams of Ben going off to college.

Dreams of Daniel being an awesome brother and a better human being for having had Ben as his brother.

Dreams of our family just being a family that loves, laughs and cries together.

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What are your dreams for your family?

8 comments:

  1. Bawwwwling.

    I guess because we still don't know what the future holds in terms of our boys' delays my dreams are ever changing. But I do know for sure that the emphasis has changed from the things like sports, etc., to what amazing people all three of my kids are going to be because they are going to have each other and they are going to be empathetic.

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  2. You will be happy to be who you are.

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  3. You are SO right. It's about dreaming the dreams that are meant for you and your family, not necessarily the ones you thought you had/wanted. Dreaming that your kids will be the best they can be!

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  4. Man this was a beautiful post. I need to make a sign too. I think I want mine to say "You will be OK." That was my biggest fear after Charlie--that I would somehow be irrevocably changed. I wasn't.

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  5. This is a fabulous post!! I'm doing a series on my blog right now about Special needs Sunday's. I'm looking for guest writers, if you're interested, please shoot me an e-mail. :) I came here from your comment on my 5 minutes for special needs post. :)

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  6. I just literally wrote down "You will dream new dreams for your family" on a Post-it.

    My dreams for my family are like yours: I just want happiness. And togetherness. And I want Max's little sister to support him and help him the best she can.

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  7. Oh, this is a beautiful post! New dreams. Better dreams!

    Once I was so worried about the future. Now, though, I realize that our futre will be just as amazing...maybe more so.

    Much love to you!

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